3.5/10 Directing is a funny thing. One might think that directing between television and feature length films are fairly similar and in many ways, they are. However, there have been several directors who have done terrific work on television only to completely fumble when it comes to taking the next step into a full length film. People like Alan Taylor who directed everything from “The Sopranos” to “Lost” to “Mad Man” to “Game of Thrones” only to fail when it came to film making by putting out movies like “Thor: The Dark World” and “Terminator: Genisys”. Lisa Joy did some excellent work on “Westworld” and “Burn Notice” only to flop with her big screen debacle “Reminiscence”. This brings us to director Miguel Sapochnik. Like Taylor, he directed for “Game of Thrones” but also put in amazing work on shows like “True Detective”, “Fringe”, “House” and the current “House of the Dragon”. Unfortunately, like Taylor and Joy before him, his feature film work doesn’t come close to matching his work on the small screen. In his defense, the script for “Finch” doesn’t give him much to work with but Sapochnik still brings us this waste of time. This is Tom Hanks bringing us his second streaming movie from Apple TV+ following “Greyhound” (also 3.5/10) and while Hanks continues to put up solid work on the big screen (“Elvis” is worth your time), his small screen output ills in comparison. “Finch” is a post-apocalyptic survival movie that follows Finch (Hanks), his dog and his two robots, one of which is made to care for his dog once he passes. The biggest problem with the movie is that it is utterly boring and goes on for about two hours, stretching your patience along the way. With all kinds of superior post-apocalyptic films ranging from action (the “Mad Max” franchise, “The Book of Eli”) to comedy (“This is the End”) to serious/depressing drama (“The Road”), etc. “Finch” does absolutely nothing to stand out. Since Finch has no other humans to talk to and his dog obviously can’t talk back, the only dialogue we get is between Finch and his new robot Jeff (Caleb Landry Jones who sounds like a robotic Borat). Since Jeff was only able to get programmed up to 72%, he still has a lot to learn. Jeff is a child like robot as Finch spends time teaching him how to walk, drive, care for his dog, etc. All of these mundane lessons are a chore to watch as Jeff is rather annoying. He even disobeys orders and lies which is strange since you’d think he would be programmed to make sure neither of those things happen. If those traits were part of the 28% that didn’t get downloaded into his programming, you’d think Finch would have been able to download the most important aspects first and foremost. Finch himself is a highly intelligent character, until the script calls for him to do something completely idiotic (and out of character) just so some manufactured drama may occur. The score is completely forgettable and for a two hour movie, there are maybe two exciting moments. It’s not that Sapochnik gives poor direction but why he thought this script was worth making into a movie in the first place is beyond me. I’m glad he is co-showrunning “House of the Dragon” because prestige television like HBO is definitely more his speed. (UPDATE: He is departing “House of the Dragon” but I hope he sticks to TV work or finds better films to make). Like Hanks’ other original Apple TV+ movie, there is no need to waste your time on this boring, uninspired snooze fest.

#ComeWithinAFinchOfDying / #MyNameIsAJeff / #SnoozeOfTheWorld / #WhyRobot? / #TheLeadDontDie / #YouveGotPale

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