3.5/10 “Greyhound”, only the third original movie from Apple+ but so far the biggest and most hyped, reminds us that Tom Hanks is a fine actor but not a fine screenwriter. Before I get into the movie’s many problems, let’s take a look at what worked. The acting is fine, certain tracks of the score are extremely fitting and the production and costume design perfectly recreate this WWII time period. Some of the cinematography is startlingly effective and I enjoyed how we are given some historical information at the end of the movie, something I believe all “based on a true story” movies should provide. Despite those aspects, the rest of the movie ends up being a dud. Although the direction is rather bland, the real problem is the screenplay that Hanks wrote. For starters, this movie is basically an hour and 20 minutes long (the final 10 minutes is largely the credits). With a movie this short, not only is everything rushed but none of these characters are developed. We don’t get to know anyone and Hanks has written some of the thinnest characters of 2020, which is a shame since most of them are based upon real people. Of course as the lead protagonist, he gives himself the most character development but even that is half assed and flimsy. A five-minute subplot with his romantic interest feels so tacked on and uninteresting and poor Elisabeth Shue has her talents wasted as she has nothing to do here. Hanks dedicates the same amount of time to showing how he skips meals due to how busy he is as he does with his romantic motivation and religious beliefs. The movie doesn’t feel intense or thrilling like other naval/submarine thrillers in the past have (“The Hunt for Red October” or “Crimson Tide” come to mind). There is nothing memorable here and you will basically begin forgetting the movie as soon as it ends. It was also difficult at times to get your bearing on which ships were firing upon who, where everyone was located and which ships were doing what. Despite briefly throwing the name of each ship over them, we instantly forget as we are bombarded with new information and the dark, watery setting doesn’t make things any easier for us. Overall we get a couple decent production elements and good actors having their talents wasted as this forgettable movie speeds along and doesn’t give us anything we haven’t seen before in a subgenre of war movies where this ranks closer to “Battleship” than it does “Das Boot”.

#LessThanSubPar / #ShuehornedSubplot / #ImTheCaptainNow / #MastAway / #CrewsOfTheWorld / #SponsoredBySubWayColdCuts

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