Men in Black

3/10 After a seven-year break from the previous film in this franchise, the “Men in Black” series returns but without the fun or chemistry that made two of the three original trilogy’s films so appealing. There are lots of problems with this movie. Tessa Thompson, whom is a very talented actress plays a Mary Sue, someone who we are told is extremely smart, talented, great with weapons, etc. but all with not at all finding out how she became so smart and skilled in all these incredible ways. She is on a probation period when she first gets to MIB headquarters but is somehow not only allowed to tag along on a dangerous mission, but then when the mission goes south is still allowed to be a part of it for some reason, despite not being qualified at all and just having spent a day or two on the job. She also is an expert at assembling and effectively firing weapons she has no prior experience or knowledge with. Chris Hemsworth on the other hand plays a very one note role and doesn’t really have any character development or any growth in his lack of character arc. Despite the two of them being fun, they lack the chemistry and witty back and forth banter that Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones had in the original trilogy. They are not as developed or compelling or as fun to follow around for two hours as Smith and Jones were. The action is all very by the numbers and in no way thrilling or exciting. The villains are completely forgettable and have zero personality. There are these two evil twins that try to be like the evil albino twins from “The Matrix” sequels, except have darker skin and even less personality. There is an evil mole in the MIB and you will spot whom that is a mile away, eliminating any and all mystery or suspense. Kumail Nanjiani voices an alien named Pawny whom is essentially a worthless character. His comic relief falls flat, he only shows up for convenience sake or as an ex machina at the last second to save the day and one scene halfway through the movie has him, Thompson and Hemsworth on an alien motorcycle falling from high in the sky downwards and we worry that they are going to fall to their deaths and die but then later in the movie we realize that Pawny has apparently always had a jetpack on his back so why didn’t he use it when he was falling down from the sky? The jetpack is only used for the script’s convenience and never practically or consistently. The fantastic practical alien effects of the original trilogy are gone and almost all replaced with CGI, the score is totally forgettable except for the theme and what is reused from the previous films and one bit with Thompson’s first day on the job is ripped from a Will Smith moment from the original film. The positives that this movie has going for it are that despite not being as solid of a duo as Smith and Jones, Thompson and Hemsworth do go well together and are easy on the eyes. The CGI is rather impressive and the production design is creative. Despite pushing two hours, the pacing is strong and you never get bored throughout the movie. Despite all of that, a totally lackluster script, no emotional bond, forgettable foes, lazy rehashes, obvious plot points and nothing standing out as memorable means that this movie may be better than the awful “Men in Black II”, but is a galaxy below the first and third installments in the series. Director F. Gary Gray previously directed the absolutely awful “The Fate of the Furious” and although this isn’t as insultingly bad, this is still a movie to avoid and wish it was sent to a galaxy far, far away and that you would be neuralyzed from remembering this movie.

#TheAgentCIsUnderAttack / #PreparationAgentH / #BlackhatAndSuit / #WillSmithReturnPlease? / #PawnySacrifice / #HighTMaintenance

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