3.5/10 TRIGGER WARNING! This movie has inspired me to get my reviews out in a timelier manner so I can do my best to warn people about truly bad films like this. This is a bad movie, I promise you. When the Cinema Sins video comes out for this, they will back me up. The ONLY reason everyone loves this movie is because it takes place in the Harry Potter universe, which we all love. I love it. But that doesn’t excuse how awful this movie was. Where do I start? This felt like a first draft of a script but because JK Rowling is so powerful no one had the balls to tell her to write another draft. Writing a screenplay is different than writing a book and her lack of screenwriting talent really shows. The pacing was off and a few scenes just dragged on too long and should have been cut down. Newt was NOT a good main character. He is nice and kind hearted but criminally negligent and puts countless people’s lives in danger. This plot was bad and had so many holes. Johnny Depp was miscast and is yet again playing a pasty weirdo (did Tim Burton get him this job?), there was a belligerent editing problem during a chase scene, characters could have used their wands way earlier than they actually do/could have teleported way earlier than they actually do to avoid all the trouble, I could go on. The romantic aspect with the fat white guy and the girl a million times out of his league felt super unrealistic and that they just needed to fill a “romance quota.” A door has magic spells keeping it shut but then all it takes is the fat human to kick it down? Lazy screenwriting. Perhaps the most overrated film of the year.
#NewtGringotts2016 / #FantasticBeastsOfNoNation / #WizardingWorldWarZ / #EzraMillerTime / #TheDrearyOfEverything / #WintersFail